Chase The Right Things

In between goals is a thing called life, that has to be lived and enjoyed.

So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they’re busy doing things they think are important. This is because they’re chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.
Mitch Albom

Do what makes you happy. Take care of yourself. Be carefree. We’re not going to live forever, and when you really think about it, it’s really not that long in the grand scheme of things. So live gracefully. Stop chasing towards material things and being someone that you’re not. Life is far too short to be anyone but yourself and to be doing anything that you’re not completely in love with.
The Power Within

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Make More Mistakes

Free to be

I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re doing something.

So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make new mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life.

Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, do it.

Make your mistakes, next year and forever.
Neil Gaiman

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When Life Expects You To Be Bitter, Be Kind Instead

Daniel Wellington watch and camel jumper

Reflecting back on my life isn’t an easy thing to do.

It has been an uphill journey through and through, full of challenges and brokenness and pain. I’ve been through a lot. And it has been the fight of my life to keep from being hardened and bitter after it all.

The thing is, if you’re like me and you’ve been physically, sexually and mentally abused; if you’ve been hurt over and over again by men or people you thought you could trust; if you’ve been bullied, betrayed or bruised; if you’ve an absent and broken family, then you have every right to take your pain and numb it with alcohol or drugs or sex. You are justified to be bitter and angry about it (and I think that those feelings can be healthy responses to mistreatment.) If this is how you respond to your pain, I don’t think that anyone who hasn’t walked in your shoes can tell you that it’s wrong. I’ve been there and I know – when you are depressed and hurt, you do all you can to fill that empty void in your heart.

What I have realized after years of learning and growing and falling and rising is that the best thing to do in response to your pain is to not let it make you angry about life, but to to let it soften and create empathy within you. When life expects you to be bitter, be kind instead. Running to self-destructive habits is the easy thing to do. But choosing to rise above it all and be a loving, warm and life-giving person is the extraordinary, remarkable, unexpected thing to do and not a path that many follow.

I want to be the latter. And I will always keep trying and fighting until the very end of my life to be that kind of person. Even when it’s hard. Even when it goes unnoticed. Even if that is all my life has amounted to. I refuse to allow hate or bitterness or anger to win over me. For those of you who feel my struggle, be encouraged as you read a much-loved quote of mine from Christopher Pointdexter:

I have spent time in cathedrals, worshiped in churches, bruised my knees at altars. I have carried God in my pocket like a little pill that makes one feel warm, energetic, joyous. I have gotten drunk with homeless men, smoked pot with strangers, kissed the devil on the stomach. I have searched for meaning and purpose in many ways, howling at truth with bloody fangs, but nothing comes close to simply being kind. Just being purely fucking generous. I know my purpose here on this frightened planet is to make people feel loved, and when I become too proud and tired for that, give my bones to the vultures. I would rather be a corpse than be hateful.




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